Wally-World's Best Kept Secret.

Did you know that Wal-Mart does have anything you need- including the cure for boredom!!! I know that’s crazy right?? Well listen up because I am about to expose that secret right here- RIGHT NOW.

The Cheapest yet Fun cure for Boredom? No need to fear. Wally-World shall come to the  rescue!

Keep Reading for “How to entertain yourself and others at Wal-Mart- The fun, cheap, and easy way to have fun.”

*This is not a joke. I am being dead serious. Before Judging go try them out for yourself!

Things You Will Need:

Hmm… This list will vary depending on your level of bravery and adventure. After you read through my lovely list of things to do you can choose the things that you will need, but I will start with a basic list:

-Yourself

-Your Imagination

-A camera (If you want)

-And any props you might want.

-Money (because after all if all else fails you can always buy something there). Because who goes to buy things at Wal-Mart right?

Why Hello. Let’s begin with my all-time favorite Wally-World experience- (Drum Roll Please…..) Playing Hide and Go Seek in Wal-Mart! Definitely the thrill of a lifetime. Don’t worry playing with your imaginary friend if no one else is available is fine too.

Me, Benjamin Weyland, Chey, and Jiho Lee Hiding like bosses. CLASSIC.

Off We Go.

And The Adventure Begins.....

1. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."
2. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
3. Planking- Classic.



Why Hello. :) Smile. Say Cheese.



4.  Walk up to an employee and say, "Can I help you?" and then ask to get a picture with them acting as if they’re Liam Hemsworth! (or a celebrity of your choice, but you can never go wrong with Liam Hemsworth…or Jack Sparrow. Haha)
5. Throw a bouncy ball down an isle and yell, "Go Pikachu Go"
6. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while and then yell loudly "There's no toilet paper in here!
7. Walk up to complete strangers and say, “Hi! I haven’t seen you in so long!…” etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassmen.
8. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you’re taking it for a “test drive.”













9. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the aisle. If you are a brave soul you can continue to be a creeper and follow them until they leave the store. Good Luck!
10. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles. (Remember to check before throwing and be smart. No bowling balls allowed!)
11. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, “Why won’t you people just leave me alone?”

12. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., “Do you have any Shnerples here?” “ya, Shnerples! Wow can’t believe it! Who do you think you are.? Sigh and walk off while saying, “why do they never have them?    


13. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
14. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from “Mission: Impossible.”
15. Two words: “Marco Polo.”
16. Leave Cheerios in the Lawn and Garden section, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
17. “Re-alphabetize” the CD’s in Electronics. (Scratch this! Ain’t anybody got time for this!)
18. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, “No, no! It’s those voices again!”







Don't Ask...







Yes. They're Professional Models. Obviously.













19. Try putting different pairs of women’s panties on your head and walk around the store casually
20. Nonchalantly “test” the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.



Picking Our Noses say Whaa???

21. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, “Red Rover!”                                            
22. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
23. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying “Good girl, good bessie.”
24. Crawl around on the ground and pretend that you’re a cat. Meow when people walk by; rub up against their legs, etc.
25. Ride around on those electric cars and pretend that you’re a proper old English Man. Say things like “Cheerio, good man.” to people who walk by. And don’t forget to have perfect posture.
26. Excessively use anything thing that says “Try Me”.
27. Draw mustaches on all the pictures and mannequins.
28. Walk up to the customer service and when they say “Hello, how may I help you?” say “Yes, I’ll have a Quarter Pounder with cheese, one strawberry shake, a large order of french fries and a diet coke.” And when they start to talk, say “Oh, to go”. Then when they say that they can’t give it to you say “Oh, This is because I’m short (for me or anything you may be. Haha) isn’t it? I’d expect this from Macey’s or Target, but not Wal-Mart. People who are _______ (fill in the blank) are just like everyone else you know. You disgust me” Then walk away mumbling to yourself.
29. Start “dancing” like mad. Basically, just wail your arms and legs around like you’re having some kind of massive seizure.
30. Act like your about to cry and ask people “Have you seen my mommy?”

Bet you didn’t know Wal-mart could be so exciting right? Well life is what you make of it. We are all children at heart so in reality with the right attitude you can have fun anywhere, but Wal-Mart is the perfect place to have an adventure. Definitely something you need to experience at least once, if not multiple times, in your lifetime.

But remember if you are bored the best thing to do is serve right. So can Wal-Mart still serve for that purpose? Of course it can! There are so many ways to serve people at Wal-Mart, but I’d like to share the one we decided to do. In the end the best thing you can do at Wal-Mart is serve your dear mom (who you love with all your heart- like I do) and go shopping for her and get groceries. She will love it! I promise. Moms in general are really busy. My mom is especially busy because she is a single mother raising a bunch of crazy kids- especially me. So going shopping for her really saves her some precious time and energy.

So shopping for her is exactly what we did.  (After we had a little fun trying some things out of course.)

And so we all served my Madre and got the groceries for the week. Serving cures boredom and depression. We were so happy, tired, with a smidge of crazy. (Hence the Picture.) Yes we Shop in Style.

With Three carts because that is how we roll.

And that was our lovely, serving, fun, crazy, simply marvelous trip to Wal-Mart. One of many adventures we have experienced in the land of Wally-World. I’m sure that there are many more in the near future, but for now that is all.

Besides serving my mom and helping her out my new favorite thing we did was....PLANKING. haha and yes I am a first timer.

Ouch.. Definitley Starting to Hurt!

If you have any questions or anymore genius ideas of what to do at Wal-Mart feel free to comment.

GOOD LUCK. BE SAFE. HAVE SMART FUN. DON’T BE STUPID.

(These are just suggestions- You cannot hold me accountable for anything that happens.)

THE END